The Early Bird

Remember hearing that from your parents ?
"The early bird gets the worm." We heard it regularly while Mom was bravely attempting to get us up for school. Or her gentle reminders to not be late.

I'm changing the saying just a little today. The early bird gets sleepy too fast.

My nightly ritual lately is:
All quiet until I lay down for the night.  Then as if by magical hour,  the cough finds its way home.  Not the chronic rejection cough, the thyroid pressing on the trachea cough. The cough that repeats over and over, "I'm gonna make you wish you could breathe and make me stop, but you can't".

Last night it started early. I was sitting in the recliner,  and Wham! I finally got things relatively calm but noticed it had triggered A-Fib. This was about 8PM.  Gotta love the feel when your heart jumps from 52 beats per minute to 118. I mean all those darned butterflies are flapping their wings in complete unison trying to break out of my chest.


I gave my heart the allotted time to correct itself,  to no avail and got my Metoprolol. Now I admit, I detest taking this and resist at all cost. It slows me way down, makes me dizzy and nauseous.
 Hoping to sleep the effects off, I went o bed.

Yes my old friend the cough came too. When it finally calmed to let me sleep, my kidneys decided they wanted the night shift. I was up every hour...grrrrrrr

 I finally waved a white flag of surrender and got up at 3:30. My heart rate is down, but not where it should be. Anothe dose of Metoprolol might do it, but not until later.  12 hours per dose,  would be 9AM.  But I have a 9:30 Doctor appointment for suture removal and since the medicine causes dizziness as well as nauseau, I think it best to wait. No, I do not want to have a stroke!  Trust me, if it gets worse, they can remove the sutures at the hospital.

Dilemmas and chaos are a part of everyday life,  just once I wish it were something other than medical chaos. But then agsin without all this my life just might be utterly dull. :-)

So here I sit, propped on the couch, resting for a bit. Maybe the Powers that be will favor me with a nap ;-)

Changes

    New year always brings change. Resolutions would be the first to come to mind.  I've had changes more akin to upheavals.
    First was the departure of my lung transplant physician and my Coordinator his wife.  I'm still getting used to this.  It's difficult to trust another doctor , when this one has kept me alive for 12 years.
   I've been working with my Endocrinologist for the last year , watching my thyroid enlarge while my Hemoglobin dropped. Even kidney transplant is concerned.
  I've been patiently waiting for my appointment on Monday.  We are so close to a resolution.  So , tonight I get a call from his office.  Today was his last day.  *huge sigh*. I am stuck in a country song.  "Here I go again. "

Grinning. .... at least I had a nice dinner at Olive Garden beforehand.

Retinal issues .

If you've been following my blog, you may remember a few years ago I had a retinal occlusion in my left eye that was hemorraging.  I got shots in that eye and to this day still feel reminiscent that I was somehow auditioning to be a victim on the show "Criminal Minds".

I stress with each check up I'll once again hear "you need another shot". Today was another reprieve,  however the EpiRetinal membrane has gotten a little bigger.  These membranes eventually cover the retina and vision is distorted,  blurred, and eventually lost.  Surgery can remove the membrane,  but my specialist feels I wouldn't have a "marked" improvement.  So I chose to wait until it would be a marked improvement in my vision.

Yesterdays CT Scan showed my thyroid has gotten larger, and is pressing on my trachea.  This could also be another reason for my coughing until I choke.  More 5o come on that as I know.

You may be thinking "what else?" Believe me,  I've asked myself that before too.
When I say my health care is a full time job, I mean it !

BUT. .. I am still here.  I am still fighting.  I still have alot to give.
I knew 24 years ago,  and still agreed to be listed for that transplant. The overwhelming thoughts of a life off oxygen,  no wheelchair,  and the ability to breathe make this journey more than worth it.

Remember to always be thankful for what you have- good,  bad,  or otherwise for the alternative for me was to not be here at all to experience this life.  

Grab life with both hands,  stand strong and hold on tight.  It's gonna be one helluva great ride !

Dilemmas and Bucket Loads

       Many of us feel overwhelmed in our daily lives at one point or another. I am no different. I've been facing a small dilemma of whether to blog about  issues I'm facing or keep quiet.  On one hand, if I blog I hope it does not change the mind of someone who is awaiting that precious Gift Of Life- an organ transplant. However. on the other hand it just may strike a chord  in someone facing a similar issue and help them feel they are not alone.

      I've been a little absent not only here but also on my FaceBook fan page, mainly due to the fact that my energy level for quite some time has seemed non-existent.  Of course, I did have to treat the lower left corner of my lip for pre- skin cancer, which in itself was no fun. A person never truly realizes how much actually touches your lips until it burns at the point of contact.. Oh and brushing your  teeth- well that was a major feat of gymnastics!. I'm an avid brusher, so I decided to bite the bullet and deal with the pain until I could get the toothpaste washed off.

  On a good note, I am still off Insulin.. YAY!!! My blood sugars are in range and I've even had a few lows. My HgbA1c  was 5.3 at my last visit so the endocrinologist is ecstatic. Why I stressed over telling him I was off insulin amazes me.

 I have however been having alot of pain. At first this was attributed to muscle and joint pain-but we now suspect that my Thyroid may have something to do with it also. I felt extremely stylish with an ace bandage wrapped around my ankle for 4 days! They found my thyroid to be enlarged and with cysts all over it via a sonogram. After the official reading we'll make a game plan. Adding to that, me the person who greets each day with a devilish grin and "hits the ground running" has lost her "get up and go" . Oh,I still greet each day with a devilish grin, but the energy level seems to be on vacation. This is completely not my style, so I am conducting an extensive search to find which tropical island my energy fairy has gone to. No more Pina coladas on the beach- honey time to come home!

    And this week has brought on a new development.  Remember how good it feels to stretch when you wake up?  Oh..me to...  Since Monday each morning I stretch it triggers my a-fib rapid heart rate.. No fun and it totally ruins that wonderful stretchy feeling.. I'm now taking extra meds for this-lucky me.. Just more to add to those little boxes to remind myself. I promised my cardiologist I'd call him if these "episodes" became more frequent than say.. 1-2 times a month. Think this falls into that category? I've had ablation for one form now I guess my heart is lonely and making itself known..

     I also know that these transplants won't last forever-but- this is not that time- trust me.  ( evil grin)