Showing posts with label enjoy life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label enjoy life. Show all posts

Monday, March 29, 2021

Struggles



 Everyone has obstacles in their life. For some, it's a  flat tire and late for work. For transplant recipients, it seems as though we are in a constant struggle to get healthy. We feel great. We get sick and have to start back at the beginning . Continually..

Immediately post transplant we want to go out and conquer the world. As years pass, our medicines take a toll and aging of our new organ creates some nasty side effects.

I'm at that cross roads. We're trying a new direction in treating my antibiotic resistant Pseudomonas.  I've stopped all nebulizer treatments.  Amikacin made it so I could barely get out of bed or make it through the day. Collistin tightened my airways so I could barely breathe.  I struggled with the known side effects of inhaled Tobramycin and lost. 

I now see a local Infectious Disease Specialist and Pulmonary physician. I was told the Tobramycin could cause hearing loss, what I was not told the loss is permanent.  Since it affects the inner ear, loss of balance is a huge problem. I was starting to notice that issue, as well as painful tinnitis.

Yesterdays walk was a little slower pace. Today was at a snails pace. Granted we had high humidity too. My low grade temperature is back which means it's time for IV antibiotics again. We're treating with antibiotics - only- right now.

Instead of letting all this get me down, I will keep trying that walk. Remember... accomplish one thing each day. If that's all you do, you accomplished that !  I Downed a few Tylenol and drank a little Root Beer to settle my stomach. Took a short nap and now feel ready to face the afternoon. 

This wee squirrel was my motivation on my walk.  He ran down the sidewalk right up to me before realizing I was real.  Looked twice and scampered off.  He gave me my morning laugh.



Find joy in each day.
Don't let negativity to rule you.
Take that walk. (Accomplish)



Thursday, June 18, 2015

How Would You Like To Be Remembered ?

      Over the last few months, I've witnessed quite a bit of bitterness in the Social Networking Groups and Personal pages of friends. It has me worried. I keep seeing, "I don't want to die waiting". "I can't wait for my transplant so I can get off oxygen". " I need to be transplanted now!"  More often than not, I see posts filled with bitterness and anger. Is this how we want to be remembered?  Someone who was bitter to the end?  Or do we want to be thought of with warmth and thoughts of she smiled to the end...

Think about it....

After working in the medical field for years and witnessing a variety of emotions from patients, I made a solemn vow that the bitterness would not over take me. I would have no regrets.  One of the best things my transplant center did was stress...
1. You may not get transplanted.
2. You may not come out at 100%
3. You may come out and still be on oxygen.
4. Live your life NOW

I always kept this in the back of my subconscious.

If I didn't get my transplant, well I died trying and gave it my best- laughing to the end.
If I didn't come out at 100% or on oxygen- I would deal with it. It's better than where I was right?

I was also told to not spend what time I had left pinning all my hopes on a transplant. What was left of my life would fade away without me realizing it. I hope others take that to heart.  Too many times we focus on this pain or that ache and not living life.
Life is meant to live- no matter your limitations.. Enjoy your family outings even if from a chair. You are there.. Your family is overjoyed you are there too.
Those birthdays are so important. Many parties show me celebrating with the birthday person on oxygen. I have a wedding photo while on oxygen. This is my life and my memories !

I cannot let anyone take those from me, or not experience them due to bitterness. Refuse to let it consume you.

Point to ponder... If you pin every hope and dream on a transplant- what happens if you don't come out 100% ?